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RESTAURANT
THE FIFTY PIMPS

2
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Kids, this has a lot of history.

3
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These restaurants from the 50s
They were very famous in the 80s.

4
00:00:45,087 --> 00:00:47,506
I'm going to enjoy this food.
Not like last night,

5
00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:50,092
when I didn't have time to shit
before the guests arrived.

6
00:00:50,592 --> 00:00:53,345
Do I have time? I'll take my chances.

7
00:00:53,428 --> 00:00:56,515
I shit on everything!
I'm going to have to add dinner to it.

8
00:00:56,598 --> 00:00:59,268
Hi guys. How are you?

9
00:00:59,351 --> 00:01:02,980
What a place.
They don't serve this 50's food anymore.

10
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:06,567
"Burgers, fries,
Coca-Cola."

11
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These kids today have no idea.

12
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I love that the waiters
They look like famous people from the 50s.

13
00:01:12,698 --> 00:01:14,741
Marilyn Monroe...

14
00:01:14,825 --> 00:01:16,201
...Elvis.

15
00:01:16,285 --> 00:01:19,037
Look, it's James Dean
after the accident.

16
00:01:19,121 --> 00:01:22,165
Let me tell you which one it is.
today's special.

17
00:01:22,249 --> 00:01:24,710
Look, Cleveland has finally arrived.

18
00:01:24,793 --> 00:01:27,254
Hello Griffin family.

19
00:01:28,422 --> 00:01:30,507
What memories!

20
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What are you, a robot?

21
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No, son.

22
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It's the 50s. I have polio.

23
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Wow, I've never heard of that.

24
00:01:41,351 --> 00:01:44,271
Yes, Chris. Polio at that time
It was like AIDS today.

25
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The difference is that those who have
polio go to heaven.

26
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Oh my gosh, "Surfin' Bird,"
of the Trashmen.

27
00:01:53,739 --> 00:01:56,575
It's my favorite song
of all time.

28
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Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

29
00:01:59,036 --> 00:02:01,622
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

30
00:02:01,705 --> 00:02:03,916
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

31
00:02:03,999 --> 00:02:06,251
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

32
00:02:06,335 --> 00:02:08,921
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

33
00:02:09,004 --> 00:02:11,298
Chris, don't you know about the bird?

34
00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:13,675
Meg, everyone knows
What bird is the word

35
00:02:13,759 --> 00:02:16,011
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

36
00:02:16,094 --> 00:02:18,514
bar guy
Bird is the word

37
00:02:18,597 --> 00:02:21,183
scared little boy
Bird is the word

38
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Lady in the toilet
Bird is the word

39
00:02:23,519 --> 00:02:25,812
Don't you know about the bird?

40
00:02:25,896 --> 00:02:28,315
Sure, everyone knows
What bird is the word

41
00:02:28,398 --> 00:02:31,401
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

42
00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:33,445
Again. I love repetition.

43
00:02:35,822 --> 00:02:37,199
Hey, what's it about?

44
00:02:37,282 --> 00:02:40,327
This song is from the 60s.
It shouldn't be on the jukebox.

45
00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:42,663
Can you give me the disk?
I love that song.

46
00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:44,915
I'll let him sleep with my daughter.

47
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,334
I don't know. Show me your daughter.

48
00:02:47,417 --> 00:02:51,129
It's there.

49
00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:53,590
Okay. I'll fuck her.

50
00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:56,009
Can you tell her to cry
and beg me to stop?

51
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That's done.

52
00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:05,978
Peter, give the song a break.

53
00:03:06,061 --> 00:03:08,188
It's been ringing since we got home.

54
00:03:08,272 --> 00:03:11,733
No way, Lois. It's my new
favorite thing in the world.

55
00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:15,988
Lois, I'll ask you just once.

56
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Do you know or don't you know...

57
00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:21,159
- ...about the bird?
- God.

58
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Everyone knows what bird is the word.

59
00:03:23,579 --> 00:03:25,831
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

60
00:03:25,914 --> 00:03:28,125
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

61
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:29,751
Bird, bird, bird

62
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God. Sorry. Sorry.

63
00:03:31,795 --> 00:03:33,922
Look, go to sleep, okay?

64
00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:39,011
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

65
00:03:39,094 --> 00:03:41,346
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

66
00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:43,765
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

67
00:03:43,849 --> 00:03:46,226
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

68
00:03:46,310 --> 00:03:48,687
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

69
00:03:48,770 --> 00:03:51,356
Peter, I have a mammogram tomorrow.

70
00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:58,155
Brian, can you lend me
the newspaper for a moment?

71
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How odd.

72
00:04:01,366 --> 00:04:04,286
- I thought it would be news.
- The fact that?

73
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I perceive the absence
from an ornithological article.

74
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A headline about knowledge
massive of a certain poultry variety.

75
00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:16,340
- What are you saying?
- Haven't you heard?

76
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I thought that everyone
he had found out.

77
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- The fact that?
- No, Brian!

78
00:04:20,135 --> 00:04:22,429
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

79
00:04:22,513 --> 00:04:24,765
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

80
00:04:24,848 --> 00:04:27,267
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

81
00:04:27,351 --> 00:04:29,728
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

82
00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:32,272
Brian, don't you know about the bird?

83
00:04:32,356 --> 00:04:34,525
Peter will tell you about the bird.

84
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Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

85
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Bird...
Surfin'

86
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Oh my god, Peter. Are you OK?

87
00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:10,143
I come from the bank. I have been told...

88
00:05:10,227 --> 00:05:12,729
...that you have taken out 6,000 dollars
of savings.

89
00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:15,607
It's almost all we have.
What the hell was it for?

90
00:05:15,691 --> 00:05:17,776
I have bought a space
on television...

91
00:05:17,860 --> 00:05:20,863
...and I made an announcement
of vital importance.

92
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Thank you. Hi, I'm Peter Griffin.

93
00:05:24,241 --> 00:05:26,702
Many Americans
They have a problem...

94
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...which worries many of us.

95
00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:30,330
According to Gallup Polls...

96
00:05:30,414 --> 00:05:34,042
...one in twelve Americans
He doesn't know what the word bird is.

97
00:05:34,126 --> 00:05:37,713
I dream of a country where everyone
know what bird is the word.

98
00:05:37,796 --> 00:05:40,132
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

99
00:05:40,215 --> 00:05:42,843
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

100
00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:45,095
OMG, is it possible?

101
00:05:45,179 --> 00:05:47,472
That the guys in the laboratory
confirm it.

102
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Calculations show that the bird
is equal to or greater than the word.

103
00:05:51,727 --> 00:05:52,853
Check it again!

104
00:05:57,482 --> 00:05:59,860
-Brian.
- Tell me.

105
00:05:59,943 --> 00:06:01,820
I don't feel well.

106
00:06:04,323 --> 00:06:06,158
It's okay now. Something has to be done.

107
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we have to catch
that disk and destroy it.

108
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Like that operation for fat people
destroyed Star Jones' arms.

109
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GASTRIC BYPASS CENTER

110
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How pretty I am.
I have lost a lot of weight.

111
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Taxi!

112
00:06:20,088 --> 00:06:22,508
I'm going to teach people
how pretty I am.

113
00:06:28,222 --> 00:06:30,557
Bird, bird, bird

114
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Bird, bird, bird

115
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Don't you know about the bird?

116
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everyone knows
What bird is the word

117
00:06:54,164 --> 00:06:56,458
Who has it been?

118
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- What, dad?
- Yes, Peter, what's wrong?

119
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Surfin' Bird has disappeared.

120
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I took it to bed, I went to bed
with him and he fell asleep in my arms.

121
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Peter, none of us would steal from you.

122
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Didn't anyone have a reason?
You all had it. All of you.

123
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Did you know that I had changed
will to leave everything to him.

124
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Meg wanted a passport so that
his twin sister left the country.

125
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I didn't expect me to discover
who doesn't have a twin...

126
00:07:22,234 --> 00:07:24,570
...and that Meg herself
He recently left the asylum.

127
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That's where Chris comes in.

128
00:07:26,238 --> 00:07:30,367
You had it all thought out, huh?
You couldn't leave things as they were.

129
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You're not going to shoot me, Chris.
You don't have guts.

130
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Sorry, dad.
I don't know what you're talking about.

131
00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:40,502
How strange, the discs do not rise
and they leave just like that.

132
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Except my old album
by Allan Sherman.

133
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If you're not going to put me,
Don't complain when I leave.

134
00:07:45,924 --> 00:07:50,262
A lot of Jews still laugh
with "Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah."

135
00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:53,640
How hot it is this morning.
I don't need the jacket.

136
00:07:53,724 --> 00:07:54,850
Fuck you all.

137
00:07:54,933 --> 00:07:58,061
I'm going to buy
another copy of Surfin' Bird.

138
00:07:58,145 --> 00:08:01,398
Peter, no need.
It will surely appear.

139
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:02,900
I wouldn't count on it.

140
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DEAD FORMAT DISCS

141
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Do you have Surfin' Bird by the Trashmen?

142
00:09:17,641 --> 00:09:18,809
I don't feel it.

143
00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:21,562
A baby and a dog
They bought all 63 copies.

144
00:09:21,645 --> 00:09:25,774
Damn. It is the third store of
used records where they tell me that.

145
00:09:25,858 --> 00:09:29,778
Your face sounds familiar to me. I know you?

146
00:09:29,862 --> 00:09:31,905
- Did you go to North Providence High School?
- No.

147
00:09:31,989 --> 00:09:34,241
Are you friends with Gary,
the one at the dry cleaners?

148
00:09:34,324 --> 00:09:35,701
No.

149
00:09:35,784 --> 00:09:37,452
- Are you Jesus Christ?
- No.

150
00:09:37,536 --> 00:09:39,538
My God, yes you are.

151
00:09:39,621 --> 00:09:41,415
- You are Jesus Christ.
- No, I'm not.

152
00:09:41,498 --> 00:09:44,418
I'm a guy who works
in a record store.

153
00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:46,003
If you are not Jesus Christ...

154
00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:48,589
...you won't mind if I pee
on these Amy Grant albums.

155
00:09:48,672 --> 00:09:50,549
- Don't do it!
- I knew it, you are Jesus.

156
00:09:50,632 --> 00:09:52,050
Yes, I am.

157
00:09:52,134 --> 00:09:55,387
My God, Jesus Christ, the Messiah.

158
00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:58,432
You're back. you're back
to bring us the good news.

159
00:09:58,515 --> 00:09:59,683
What new?

160
00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:02,144
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

161
00:10:02,227 --> 00:10:04,521
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

162
00:10:04,605 --> 00:10:06,940
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

163
00:10:07,024 --> 00:10:09,359
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

164
00:10:09,443 --> 00:10:11,778
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

165
00:10:16,366 --> 00:10:18,744
Jesus Christ has returned to Earth.

166
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:21,163
I can't believe it.
The Second Coming.

167
00:10:21,246 --> 00:10:23,290
Don't scream. It is not the Second Coming.

168
00:10:23,373 --> 00:10:25,125
So what are you doing here?

169
00:10:25,209 --> 00:10:28,545
Believe it or not,
I appear every hundred years or so.

170
00:10:28,629 --> 00:10:31,256
Incognito,
to escape from the family.

171
00:10:31,340 --> 00:10:32,883
Plus, it was a good time.

172
00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:35,427
my father has left
of smoking and is trilling.

173
00:10:35,511 --> 00:10:37,262
Who took my checkbook?

174
00:10:37,346 --> 00:10:38,722
Ellen!

175
00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:41,600
What are you doing here
a pen cap without a pen?

176
00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:44,520
You are the first person
who recognizes me in 2,000 years.

177
00:10:44,603 --> 00:10:47,606
You seem like a nice guy.
Come to my house for dinner.

178
00:10:47,689 --> 00:10:50,859
- Okay, but I leave at seven.
- Great, we'll have a blast.

179
00:10:50,943 --> 00:10:55,072
We can see the YouTube video of
Marlee Matlin calling Moviefone.

180
00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:58,534
Please say the name
of the movie you want to see.

181
00:10:58,617 --> 00:11:00,244
Mimzy, beyond imagination.

182
00:11:00,327 --> 00:11:02,329
I'm sorry, I didn't understand it.

183
00:11:02,412 --> 00:11:05,791
Please say the name
of the movie you want to see.

184
00:11:05,874 --> 00:11:08,168
Mimzy, beyond imagination.

185
00:11:08,252 --> 00:11:10,671
You have selected 300.

186
00:11:10,754 --> 00:11:14,299
If it's the movie
what you want to see, say "yes."

187
00:11:14,383 --> 00:11:18,220
- No.
- He has confirmed 300.

188
00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:25,769
Wow, Jesus Christ dining with us.

189
00:11:25,853 --> 00:11:27,354
I can't get used to it.

190
00:11:27,437 --> 00:11:29,231
I'm glad you're all here.

191
00:11:29,314 --> 00:11:32,442
I want to tell you that
one of you will betray me.

192
00:11:33,235 --> 00:11:34,528
No, it's a joke.

193
00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:37,865
That's what I said
in his storybook.

194
00:11:37,948 --> 00:11:40,325
Finish the story
What were you saying, Jesus?

195
00:11:40,409 --> 00:11:43,912
Okay. They beat me up
until I was unconscious...

196
00:11:43,996 --> 00:11:46,999
...thorns stuck in me,
They nailed me to a tree...

197
00:11:47,082 --> 00:11:50,169
...they put a sponge with vinegar in me
through the mouth and they killed me.

198
00:11:50,252 --> 00:11:53,881
Then they put me in a covered hole
with a stone for two days.

199
00:11:53,964 --> 00:11:56,383
And on Sunday, bam!
I rose from the dead.

200
00:11:56,466 --> 00:11:59,511
It seems like a crazy weekend,
but I have a better one.

201
00:11:59,595 --> 00:12:02,890
Me, Cleveland and Joe got
fart based on Southern Comfort.

202
00:12:02,973 --> 00:12:06,560
We were going to throw up, but Joe said:
"Let's watch The Chronicles of Riddick."

203
00:12:06,643 --> 00:12:08,770
We saw it all without vomiting.

204
00:12:08,854 --> 00:12:12,524
When I got home,
I had lost my glasses.

205
00:12:12,608 --> 00:12:14,526
Peter, one. Jesus, zero.

206
00:12:14,610 --> 00:12:18,989
Would you mind talking on your cell phone?
with my friend Muriel Goldman?

207
00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:21,658
I want to rub this in
for his Jewish face.

208
00:12:21,742 --> 00:12:23,160
Ok, I'll say it:

209
00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:26,413
How do we know you are Jesus?
Can you do miracles?

210
00:12:26,496 --> 00:12:29,458
Clear. What do you think of this?

211
00:12:30,334 --> 00:12:33,504
- Oh my goodness, a glass of ice cream.
- I love you, Jesus.

212
00:12:33,587 --> 00:12:35,214
I love you too, buddy.

213
00:12:35,297 --> 00:12:39,301
- Jesus, would you do something for me?
- Sure, Peter. The fact that?

214
00:12:47,935 --> 00:12:50,604
Jesus, I know
You don't want to attract attention...

215
00:12:50,687 --> 00:12:53,315
...but I really want
to introduce yourself to someone.

216
00:12:53,398 --> 00:12:54,816
Yeah? Whom?

217
00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:57,694
The American people may
is now against the war,

218
00:12:57,778 --> 00:12:59,821
But I answer to a higher power.

219
00:12:59,905 --> 00:13:02,491
I answer to the power of Jesus Christ.

220
00:13:02,574 --> 00:13:06,286
It's funny, I have Jesus Christ here.

221
00:13:06,370 --> 00:13:09,581
I heard what you said.
You don't know anything about my work.

222
00:13:09,957 --> 00:13:12,876
It's amazing that you came
to be president of something.

223
00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:14,837
Wouldn't that be great?
that life was like that?

224
00:13:17,172 --> 00:13:19,967
Jesus, thanks for stopping by.
tonight with us.

225
00:13:20,425 --> 00:13:23,053
You will look like a lazy person,
But you have a lot of talent, young man.

226
00:13:23,554 --> 00:13:26,598
I had forgotten how cool
which is relating to other people.

227
00:13:26,682 --> 00:13:29,685
I'm going to bed.
Tomorrow I have to open the store.

228
00:13:29,768 --> 00:13:32,938
You won't want to go back to that store.
You have to go out...

229
00:13:33,021 --> 00:13:35,065
...to color eggs
and hide them for the children.

230
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:37,359
Do you want me to reveal who I am?

231
00:13:37,734 --> 00:13:40,028
Of course.
The world needs you, Jesus.

232
00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:43,490
Just like someone who can't get up
needs a distraction.

233
00:13:44,825 --> 00:13:47,035
I'm ready to make love to you.

234
00:13:47,536 --> 00:13:49,663
- Is that my phone?
- I don't hear anything.

235
00:13:50,289 --> 00:13:51,290
Is that John Astin?

236
00:13:51,623 --> 00:13:53,000
I don't see anyone out there.

237
00:13:53,959 --> 00:13:56,003
Now there is too much mess.

238
00:13:56,503 --> 00:13:59,214
You're right. It may be
the moment. But how do we do it?

239
00:14:00,007 --> 00:14:01,967
Pay attention, please.

240
00:14:02,467 --> 00:14:06,471
I present to you the only one
and inimitable Jesus Christ.

241
00:14:07,431 --> 00:14:10,350
That's how it is. This here is Jesus Christ.

242
00:14:11,643 --> 00:14:14,062
- Jesus Christ.
- Yes of course.

243
00:14:14,146 --> 00:14:15,981
What idiots, they don't even listen.

244
00:14:16,064 --> 00:14:18,400
We have to prove it to them.

245
00:14:18,483 --> 00:14:20,694
I'll buy water at the supermarket...

246
00:14:20,777 --> 00:14:22,779
- ...and you will turn it into wine.
- Cool.

247
00:14:22,863 --> 00:14:24,990
Could you buy me Cracked magazine?

248
00:14:25,073 --> 00:14:26,742
- Cracked?
- Yes.

249
00:14:26,825 --> 00:14:28,577
Jesus Christ, I can't believe it.

250
00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:30,162
Okay, I'll be right back.

251
00:14:33,332 --> 00:14:35,709
- Shit.
- Don't worry, I'll take it.

252
00:14:42,758 --> 00:14:44,426
- My God.
- It's Jesus.

253
00:14:44,510 --> 00:14:46,094
- It's him.
- It's Jesus.

254
00:14:46,637 --> 00:14:48,805
And his best friend, Peter.

255
00:14:52,059 --> 00:14:53,560
THE TONIGHT SHOW
WITH JAY LENO

256
00:14:53,644 --> 00:14:56,063
PROVIDING BACKGROUND NOISE FOR
SEXUAL RELATIONS SINCE 1992

257
00:14:56,855 --> 00:14:58,315
Fifteen minutes, Mr. Christ.

258
00:14:58,398 --> 00:15:02,569
Jesus, can you believe
Are you going to meet Jay Leno?

259
00:15:02,653 --> 00:15:06,823
Why when Jesus
he revealed himself to the world he became famous...

260
00:15:06,907 --> 00:15:09,743
...and when I did it
They expelled me for five days?

261
00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:13,664
I owe all this to you.
You gave me the confidence I needed.

262
00:15:13,747 --> 00:15:16,959
Forget about that.
Go out there and leave them dead.

263
00:15:17,042 --> 00:15:18,919
- Who are you?
- Jesus Christ.

264
00:15:19,002 --> 00:15:20,754
- Who are you?
- Jesus Christ.

265
00:15:20,838 --> 00:15:22,256
- Who are you?
- Jesus Christ!

266
00:15:22,339 --> 00:15:23,507
Go for them.

267
00:15:23,590 --> 00:15:25,676
Thanks again to Dave Coulier.

268
00:15:25,759 --> 00:15:29,346
The third season of Full House
It will be released on DVD on March 5.

269
00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:33,308
The next guest died for our
sins and has returned to the lampstand.

270
00:15:33,392 --> 00:15:36,228
Let's welcome
to Jesus Christ, from the Bible. Jesus.

271
00:15:41,817 --> 00:15:44,820
- Hello, Jesus. Welcome.
- Thank you. It's a pleasure.

272
00:15:44,903 --> 00:15:47,364
What have you done since you came back?

273
00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:49,449
Lazy...

274
00:15:49,533 --> 00:15:52,286
...play Call of Duty 4
and eat a lot of frozen yogurt.

275
00:15:55,789 --> 00:15:59,585
And see what the nightlife is like here.
I resurrected River Phoenix.

276
00:15:59,668 --> 00:16:02,004
Then we went to Viper Room
and had another overdose.

277
00:16:07,009 --> 00:16:11,013
Ladies and gentlemen, Jesus Christ.
We'll be right back with Joss Stone.

278
00:16:11,722 --> 00:16:13,307
UNFORTUNATELY,
THERE IS EVEN MORE

279
00:16:14,224 --> 00:16:17,811
Have you seen that?
He made Jay Leno laugh.

280
00:16:17,895 --> 00:16:20,647
This guy is going to be great.

281
00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:24,943
CHICAGO TRIBUNE
HE HAS CLIMBED TO THE HIGHEST!

282
00:16:25,819 --> 00:16:29,198
TIME
messiah of the year

283
00:16:30,073 --> 00:16:33,493
NEW YORK POST
JESUS BIGGER THAN JESUS

284
00:16:34,119 --> 00:16:38,498
We return to the MTV Movie Awards,
presented by Dane Cook.

285
00:16:38,582 --> 00:16:42,503
Hello, what's up? I'm Dane Cook.
and these are the MTV Movie Awards.

286
00:16:42,586 --> 00:16:45,005
What's happening? What's happening?
Do you know what I hate?

287
00:16:45,339 --> 00:16:48,300
When you eat ice cream
and it's so cold what do you do...

288
00:16:48,884 --> 00:16:51,220
You say, "Why haven't you told me
that was so cold?"

289
00:16:51,303 --> 00:16:53,972
And they tell you: "It's ice cream, man."
And you: "My mother."

290
00:16:54,056 --> 00:16:56,558
But it doesn't happen to girls
because they use a spoon.

291
00:16:57,601 --> 00:16:58,519
What's happening?

292
00:16:58,852 --> 00:17:00,062
MySpace.

293
00:17:00,145 --> 00:17:02,481
- Are you saying something funny?
- I don't know.

294
00:17:02,564 --> 00:17:04,650
It's moving a lot,
so I guess so.

295
00:17:04,733 --> 00:17:06,985
It comes out on the Internet
and I go to university.

296
00:17:07,069 --> 00:17:08,529
Will present the award...

297
00:17:08,612 --> 00:17:12,491
...to the best tuning business
of screen gangsters...

298
00:17:12,574 --> 00:17:14,743
...Jesus Christ and the Horny Dolls.

299
00:17:19,122 --> 00:17:21,583
Jesus! That's my friend, Jesus.

300
00:17:22,334 --> 00:17:26,380
Who would think that I, Peter Griffin, the
Dude, just two weeks ago...

301
00:17:26,463 --> 00:17:28,966
...it drew a smile on his testicle
to make your son laugh...

302
00:17:30,467 --> 00:17:33,345
What I was saying has gone away,
but... Well, it's my friend Jesus!

303
00:17:33,846 --> 00:17:37,724
It's a pleasure to be here
with these interchangeable women.

304
00:17:37,808 --> 00:17:41,395
The last time I came down to Earth
He was only with a whore.

305
00:17:51,113 --> 00:17:53,323
Come on, guys. Let's go to my kelo.

306
00:17:54,575 --> 00:17:56,201
Would you mind tightening your grip a little?

307
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:59,162
I'm sorry, Peter.
There seems to be no room.

308
00:17:59,246 --> 00:18:00,873
How do you say?

309
00:18:00,956 --> 00:18:04,042
There is only one place left
and I have promised that cow.

310
00:18:04,126 --> 00:18:07,337
What fun. I'll stick my head out
through the roof window...

311
00:18:07,421 --> 00:18:10,257
...I will shake my arms and say:
"I'm in Hollywood."

312
00:18:11,675 --> 00:18:14,595
I'm in Hollywood!
Do you see it? I said I would do it.

313
00:18:18,307 --> 00:18:20,809
Do you want to leave that?
We are having dinner.

314
00:18:20,893 --> 00:18:25,189
Incredible, Jesus has not called me.
I left him a message four hours ago.

315
00:18:25,272 --> 00:18:27,149
Maybe he doesn't have his cell phone.

316
00:18:27,232 --> 00:18:29,860
No, it rang twice
and the voicemail went off.

317
00:18:29,943 --> 00:18:32,738
If I had jumped straight,
It's just that I had it turned off.

318
00:18:32,821 --> 00:18:35,407
If it had rung six times,
I hadn't heard it.

319
00:18:35,490 --> 00:18:36,742
But it rang twice, Lois.

320
00:18:36,825 --> 00:18:39,119
That means it rang,
He saw it was me...

321
00:18:39,203 --> 00:18:40,913
...and pressed a button
so that the mailbox would jump.

322
00:18:41,288 --> 00:18:43,165
Give me your cell phone. I'm sure he'll take it.

323
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,877
Hello, Lois.

324
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,378
Hi, I'm Peter.

325
00:18:48,462 --> 00:18:50,631
What's happening? We had met.

326
00:18:50,714 --> 00:18:53,634
I forgot to tell you
I have an appointment with the doctor.

327
00:18:53,717 --> 00:18:54,927
I'm in the consultation.

328
00:18:55,010 --> 00:18:57,387
Look, Lindsay Lohan
He has taken off his shirt.

329
00:18:57,471 --> 00:19:01,475
I drank a beer.
Who wants to make out with me?

330
00:19:01,558 --> 00:19:02,809
- I.
- Me too.

331
00:19:02,893 --> 00:19:04,686
I just did it, let's go again.

332
00:19:04,770 --> 00:19:05,896
I have to hang up.

333
00:19:05,979 --> 00:19:08,273
Can you believe that
Is Jesus treating me like this?

334
00:19:08,357 --> 00:19:09,816
I thought he was my friend.

335
00:19:09,900 --> 00:19:13,195
Fame and success
They drive people crazy, Peter.

336
00:19:13,278 --> 00:19:16,406
Surely, deep down,
He is still the same Jesus.

337
00:19:16,490 --> 00:19:18,784
you may need
Discover it your way.

338
00:19:18,867 --> 00:19:22,663
Maybe, but one thing is for sure:
none of this would have happened...

339
00:19:22,746 --> 00:19:25,999
...if they hadn't robbed me
my fucking Surfin' Bird album.

340
00:19:30,796 --> 00:19:33,966
They have found Jesus Christ,
record store employee...

341
00:19:34,049 --> 00:19:36,593
...in Mary-Kate Olsen's apartment...

342
00:19:36,677 --> 00:19:38,178
...face down and unconscious.

343
00:19:38,262 --> 00:19:40,848
The police revived
and stopped the disoriented Jesus...

344
00:19:40,931 --> 00:19:44,935
...who said: "The Jews are to blame
of all the wars in the world."

345
00:19:45,269 --> 00:19:47,145
Brian, do you think he'll be our Jesus?

346
00:19:48,438 --> 00:19:51,024
Griffin Residence, Peter speaking.

347
00:19:51,108 --> 00:19:53,068
Yeah? Why would I do it?

348
00:19:54,152 --> 00:19:57,030
Find someone else to pay your bail,
because it won't be me.

349
00:19:58,574 --> 00:20:00,492
And what are you going to do?

350
00:20:01,994 --> 00:20:02,953
Okay, I'm going there.

351
00:20:03,245 --> 00:20:05,706
QUAHOG POLICE

352
00:20:05,956 --> 00:20:08,166
Jesus Christ, look at you.

353
00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:11,545
You had it all:
money, fame, eternal life.

354
00:20:11,628 --> 00:20:13,589
And you ruined it all.
It went to your head.

355
00:20:13,922 --> 00:20:15,090
I know, Peter.

356
00:20:15,174 --> 00:20:18,552
I guess I am
as human as anyone.

357
00:20:18,635 --> 00:20:21,013
Yeah? And what do we do now?

358
00:20:21,096 --> 00:20:24,224
Do you want me to tell you the truth?
I think I should go.

359
00:20:24,308 --> 00:20:27,311
This world is not ready for me yet.
Nor me for him.

360
00:20:27,394 --> 00:20:31,064
I don't know, I'll try to come back anyway.
In another thousand years...

361
00:20:31,148 --> 00:20:32,441
...when he's more mature.

362
00:20:32,858 --> 00:20:35,861
What you just said is very mature.

363
00:20:35,944 --> 00:20:38,030
I think you are on the right track.

364
00:20:38,113 --> 00:20:42,117
Before I go, Peter,
I want to give you something.

365
00:20:42,201 --> 00:20:43,410
Extend your hands.

366
00:20:50,584 --> 00:20:53,504
Well, it looks like it's over.
Jesus is gone.

367
00:20:53,587 --> 00:20:56,548
- I will miss him a lot.
- Me too.

368
00:20:56,632 --> 00:20:59,134
He gave me one thing before he disappeared.

369
00:20:59,218 --> 00:21:01,720
- The fact that?
- Something very special, Lois.

370
00:21:01,803 --> 00:21:02,930
What, dad?

371
00:21:03,013 --> 00:21:04,806
- Have you not heard?
- Shit!

372
00:21:04,890 --> 00:21:07,476
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

373
00:21:07,559 --> 00:21:09,895
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

374
00:21:09,978 --> 00:21:12,356
Bird, bird, bird
Bird is the word

375
00:21:44,096 --> 00:21:45,097
Subtitles: Maria Josefa Chacon Tornero